Former National Lampoon CEO Jailed for 50 Years

Fifty year-old executive Tim Durham, former National Lampoon CEO, was sentenced by US District Judge Jane Magnus-Stinson to fifty years in prison, a downward departure from the 225 years requested by prosecutors, according to this story. Yeah, OK, they supposedly squandered $208 million of investor money, including $125K belonging to a septuagenarian nun. But 225 years? Sure, if somebody actually gets sentenced to life, well it's over when they die. Then they get to leave prison. But if the coercion community is going to give somebody 225 years of slammer time, that's what they should get, dead or alive. Embalmed, in a climate controlled box, their remains should be visible for the 2 and a quarter centuries. Guards should have to check on their presence during each of their rounds. The law is the law. Aside from the literally insane prosecutors, what about Judge Jane? She's upset, I guess, (Judges do get upset with those under their thumb). “I found no sincere remorse,” U.S. District Judge Jane Magnus-Stinson in Indianapolis said today before imposing punishment on Durham, 50. She said the former Fair Finance Co. CEO exhibited deceit, greed and arrogance. We've gone into this before. These guys stole $208 million. We can measure that numerically. We can even visualize a big pile of bills that might add up to that sum. But, how do you measure greed, remorse, deceit and arrogance? What would a stack of deceit look like? How do any of those subjective evaluations translate to illegal behavior? If arrogance was a crime Porsche would have folded long ago for lack of customers. Greed is a word that's been bandied about almost as much as the formerly most printed words in the world, "Close cover before striking". Sincere remorse. You can rest assured that Tim Durham is pretty remorseful, his entire fortune, ill-gotten or otherwise, having been confiscated by defense lawyers, fines, etc. and he himself being relegated to the unhappy federal prison system. Yeah, he's remorseful, alright, as if that would have made any difference to Judge Jane.



Jane Magnus-Stinson, US District Judge for Southern Indiana



Joseph Hogsett, US attorney for southern Indiana and candidate for mayor of Indianapolis recommended a 225 year prison sentence for Tim Durham.